Australia: It's Not You...It's Me

Dear Australia,

We need to talk.

You know I've always loved you. Ever since I sketched the Sydney Opera House for school (and got a superlative grade!) I've been fascinated by your glorious architecture, your barren outback (that's what she said) and your incredible barrier reef. For a kid growing up in Alaska, it's hard not to be because my state and your country are direct opposites in a lot of ways.

But just because I love you doesn't mean I'm in love with you.

The reason why is me, not you. I quickly realized that 2 weeks and the paltry thousands of US dollars I brought to your shores was just not enough, and that is entirely my fault. You deserve better (and more...mostly more).

It isn't that I didn't love parts of you. Your southern region, namely Melbourne, was artistic and easy to traverse. It was diverse, it was exciting, it was delicious, and it was a whole lot of fun. I could spend lots and lots of time there - it is wonderful.

Same with Noosa, with its chill beach town vibe, its people and its close proximity to rad things to do like Fraser Island, which was a glorious natural sand island (massive island! All sand!) with one of the most amazing lakes I've ever seen.

But your temperamental weather, weak sauce major cities (I'm looking at you Brisbane and Sydney), and insanely expensive nature harmed our relationship irreparably. But that isn't your fault - New Zealand upped the ante and it would be hard for anyone to match its wonder.

What I'm trying to say is, while I will always love you and appreciated our time together, I think it's time we started seeing other countries. You can have England (not that you already don't have them - tramp!!!), and I will take Thailand. I think it is better for the both of us.

Love,

David Harper

P.S. I want my The Living End albums and Crocodile Dundee DVD's back. I'm sure you understand.